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m.m. then you can understand his motivation But maybe you could help him to get an erection at other times by giving him foreplayAs men age they may need physical stimulation to obtain an erection and maybe that's what is happening in this case So try that and see if you can reset his clockQ: I'm very lucky right now I have an awesome boyfriend of two years who makes sure I orgasm every time we have sex However I'm very picky about the way that I orgasm and I was wondering if there is some way to train myself to appreciate a little more variety I require a very specific kind of touch and position This means we end up in the same two positions every time we have sex and after two years of routine sex (and the same issue with previous partners) I'd like some more variety at least in this aspectA: As you said you have a boyfriend and can have orgasms so you're a lucky person I'm not saying you shouldn't try to add some variety but don't allow this desire to add pressure to the situation or else it won't work; it won't give you the orgasms you wantWhat I might suggest is that the two of you go to a motel even one that's just around the corner and set aside some time to have sex in different ways Try to teach him what sensations you need in order to have an orgasm Try lots of different positions knowing that if something doesn't work you're going to be working at it for several hours or maybe even all night so that in the end you'll find satisfaction but this is a time for experimentationBy leaving home it will be easier to accept any failure You won't be in your bedroom so it'll be less likely that you'll dwell on what doesn't work Of course if you discover how to improve your sex life then you can add that to your sexual repertoire at homeBut see if being out of the normal routine gives you some additional freedom that you can put to good useQ: My partner and I have problems in the bedroom I can never orgasm with him He is a very good lover but I think my issues run deeper Could it be that I have trust issues Don't get me wrong he has never cheated on me that I know of We have been together for five years I'm 36 and we have a 4-year-old He just started this new medication Cymbalta He told me he doesn't even think about sex but there was porn on his phone I know it is frustrating for him that I never orgasm How long can a man really go without sex He is 46 HelpA: You say you can never orgasm with him which implies that you have had orgasms with other men That would lead me to believe that you two have a relationship problem of some sort mixed in with a misunderstanding about sexIf you really want to get to the bottom of this I'd suggest that the two of you see a sex therapist If you go it doesn't guarantee that a solution will be readily available but the odds will be much better of you figuring this out with professional help than withoutQ: I am unable to have an orgasm with my husband We have been together for 13 years and I've been faking it for that long I can easily bring myself to orgasm when I'm alone but I cannot do it in front of him I get aroused when we're intimate but at some point toward climax my arousal levels off and then peters out This always happens regardless of how he is stimulating me What is wrong I am so incredibly frustrated I think I need to see a sex therapist Could you tell me how I might contact one in my areaA: I agree that a sex therapist might be of great assistance to you I never recommend specific therapists but if you go to a large teaching hospital near you and ask to see a social worker you'll be able to get a recommendationDr Ruth Westheimer is the author of "Dr Ruth's Sex After 50" (Quill Driver Books) and "Sex for Dummies" (IDG Books) Have a question for Dr Ruth Write to her at Distributed by King Features Syndicate Jim Edgar, I need to be governor to lead this state and make it work again. inter-disciplinary spectacle with a huge budget.But the great strength of this remarkable piece of entertainment is the quality of its acts. Cubs fans. and they have been able to find help at the minor-league level.9 Asian 52.4
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